This is the view from 32 floors where I work. The bottom one you can see the sprint center being built, and that building in the middle that looks like a giant deoderant speedstick is H&R Block headquarters, I may be moving there after this tax season, not sure. And the picture at the top is my nifty office, where my brain goes to get tortured Monday through Friday ( jk I like my job) hard on the brain though... We've got a huge food court across the street, complete with taco bell, jasons deli, planet sub, subway, koko teryiaki, smokin joes, starbucks, antonio's pizza, an ice cream bar, and a sushi bar. We've got two resteraunt/bars on the first floor, Fred P Otts and Mangos, 1$ pints on Mondays and 75 cent tacos,,whohoo! (after 3pm of course) H&R Block headqarters shares it's building with the KC rep theatre, Sherlock Holmes is coming up...anyone interested?

       I have to anncounce that I have quit World of Warcraft!! Are there really 24 hours in a day? Holy crap. I forgot! So, before I quit I knew that I would have to obsess about something else, so I joined the ymca. (now I've had memberships at gyms on and off since I was about 15) but I am serious about this one. I have only missed one or two days of working out (since about 1 month ago) I run about 3 1/2 miles every other night on the treadmill, and lift weights in between. There's so much more time to accomplish things now! Well partially my reason for joining the Y was the KC corporate challenge in May - July. I signed up for 5 events (yes I am insane) ...the 5K run (which is roughly 3.2 miles) , the mile run, the 800 m run, mens basketball, and flag football (which is coed). The time to beat for the 5k run is about 19min, which is roughly 6 min 20 sec for each mile, YIKES. right now my time is nearly 30 minutes...so I got some work to do. And sooner or later I'm gonna have to make a fool of myself and get back on the b ball court, it has been a LONG time.

hmm that's it for me..oh yeah ..watch "The Office" ..funy funny show, on the 2nd season now

I had a really original thought the other day (original meaning I had never thought about a certain subject this way before) From junior high on I was taught calvinism. Later, it pretty much shaped the way I saw God, people, and myself in so many ways....ways that I am STILL discovering. I liken it almost to someone who has battled a crippeling disease..never realized the subtle effects it had on the self. It's really amazing actually. For someone who has not truly known his/herself to discover true sense of being is just an amazing thing.

     First of all, I have healed/am healing from the crippeling determinism that calvinism teaches. I actually found that even when I flatly denied calvinism I still pshycologically bought into the whole belief that the future/life/ our choices are already determined. I NEVER actually took prayer seriously. No matter how hard you try you cannot cause an absolute contradiction to somewhow reveal truth. You either prayed for things that actually had a genuine chance to happen or NOT happen or it was an excercise in madness. I almost subconciously acted out a pathetic view of life, that things will eventually happen just the way they were supposed to happen.. (talk about a mental straight jacket!) Now it just makes SO much more sense. Life is how YOU make it,  there are variables you can't control but you genuinely make choices that can ACTUALLY effect the future. I feel really sorry for some of these overly intelectual people that get caught up on metaphysics, etc... It is SO much more empowering to be through with that stuff...and contrary to the calvinists claim..I think it gives MORE glory to God that he made such a dynamic world where REAL choice was possible.

       Next... For a while I really had an aversion for right wing politics, Bush, conservatism..etc.. I realize that I kind of lumped all of the concepts of conservatism in with calvinism..you know one of those "well it's tough but true" kind of things... The kind of power/masculinity that is praised in calvinism I hated (and rightly so) and I kind of wanted nothing to do with masculinity. The big bad United States minus well be the big bad soveriegn god of calvinism, excercising unilateral power ...smiting enemies..etc.. In my mind, the two ideas (conservatism and calvinism) came from the same origin..a misunderstanding of masculinity and the excercise of immense power. In fact, to be honest..I could not figure out HOW IN THE HECK the Eudalys were conservative! lol

        This leads me to my original thought. The other day I heard a very obviously calvinist message. I thought to myself...MAN this is just pathetic! It's more LIBERAL than it is conseravative! Talk about absolving responsiblity! In the same way liberalism (and it's anti-reality view of people) inevitably appeases every single evil the US faces, calvinism (in it's own uniquely anti reality approach to people) enables people to continue in a nearly endless cycle of self loathing and a sort of persecution complex. Holy Crap! You wouldn't even find this much "suffering" in an African, aid infested hospital in the middle of nowhere, cut off from all supplies and civilization. Because calvnism inherently undermines the reality of CHOICE, it inevitably leads to people that do not view their CHOICES in a healthy/empowering way. They instead choose to believe in a all powerful (and often schitzofrenic) God that has weaved and manipulated each of their choices to fit in with EXACTLY what SHOULD and HAS happened! Am I hurting your brain yet? I think that same sickness infects liberalism in America and it's inaction in the face of extreme circumstances. If you don't understand yourself, you do NOT understand people and the world around you.

    To me, the United States and George Bushes polices could not be more anti calvinistic. When you truly understand what you face and you make a genuine choice to stand up against it, you are in effect destroying the effects of calvinism. To me calvnism sort of attempts to clothe itself in it's own self importance and sense of inbred honor, when in fact it is nothing but a poser. To me, the brave people actually doing something about the real life issue we face are the church. Sure the 5 points can be flaty denied (with a 5 year olds understanding of logic) but even more deep are the underlying issues that calivnism originates from. These seem to be VERY clear to me the other day. I realized how deeply calvinism is rooted in a very skewered view of one's self along with a skewered view of responsibility. You know the phrase.."theology is more anthropology than it is the study of God." Well that could not be more true than with calvinism. And funniest of all is the fact that calvnism does not admit or give an inch to the premises of outside systems of logic and/or reason. It affirms itself with it's own premises. Not only is it a system of belief..but out of that it has morphed it's own realm of logic/premises that confirm it's truth. No other theory, belief, system, idea that I can think of gets away with such intelectual dishonesty.

           You know everytime you hear someone overly angry at something.. like man I can't STAND dogs, or when you mention a topic..they get silent. I think we could all say that these people are irattionally upset at certain things, objects..or concepts. It's called transferance or projection. One of those two. Well I sat their listening.. and a long brought up topic came up ONCE AGAIN.. Arminiasm..and the belief that people have the ability to accept Christ..etc... And there AGAIN was this really strong anger towards it. I'm sitting there thinking..wow.. lol . Where does that anger come from? Why were some of these people that differed with certain other people considered heretics and/or expelled/imprisoned/killed? How could something so stupid cause so much emotion? Well long story short..I sat there and just wondered...this is like a cult? These people do not operate within the same constructs of what I like to call reality. I just find the whole dynamic of such things mind boggeling. I mean I internally I know how people can think these things..because I've been there...but to be as old as some of these people and not have changed? And to want that sort of environment for your children? I just don't know about that. A theology that leads people to question God during crisis is just pathetic and it is irreponsible. I don't care if I get cancer tomorrow and my house burns down..nothing would ever lead me to believe that God had anything to do with it. I don't know..maybe it's a sort of projection of their real parents on God..maybe their real parents were ambiguous in their morality..but I sure as heck know that God isn't.

I see the same split in the psyche of calvnists that I do in liberals. They do not understand themselves. I often see liberals portray Bush (or the hated masculine figure of the day) in terms that are so incredibly irrational, it does not even deserve a response. They are so internally confused (although they swear they are enlightened) that they do not have a healthy understanding of the balance of a whole person. In fact, wholeness is a threat and scares them. At the same time they curse the capitalism and greed of the US, they enjoy the freedom it offers, and some of them beneift in millions from the system. Calvinists believe God has everything just where he wants it, has planned everything, yet they still act and behave as if theire is genuine possibility in life. Calvnists claim that God pre planned who he would grant the ability to accept Christ to, yet they cannot help but act as if people are the final determiners of their eternal destiny, (although it is rather humorous to see the attempts at consistency) What I've realized is that being whole is recognizing things as they truly are. Things are no longer extensions of oneself but have their own indpendent existence and reality to them. This opens the world to real possibility and endless opportunity..and yes a LOT BIGGER sense of responsibility. I think this kind of a world is scary to a calvinist, and they would rather stay where it is safe.

        I've looked at calvinism a lot of different ways since I came out of it. For a while I spent my time simply disproving it using the Bible, pointing out misdefined terms, broken context, etc... I then kind of went at it logically, pointing out the obvious irrationality of it. It wasn't until a couple days ago that I kind of thought about it a different way...and it really all made sense, and I thank God I have moved on.

Election day.... Having listened to the news, CSPAN, CNN, KCTV5, and miscellanious callers on radio shows, I am losing hope in the belief that there is intelligent life left on this earth...  / cry ....

Druid Declaration of Independence (you wow players will understand) (from the druid forums)

When in the Course of gaming events, it becomes necessary for one class to dissolve the discussion bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all classes are created equal in WoW, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Raiding, PvP and the pursuit of Epics. --That to secure these rights, Developers are instituted among Gamers, deriving their just powers from the consent of the gamer, --That whenever any Group of Developers becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the Class to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Developers, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Game play and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Developers long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that gamers are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Developers, and to provide new Guards for their future security. —Such has been the patient sufferance of the Druid Class; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Development. The history of Jeffrey Kaplan is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over this our beloved class.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the Developer of a free class of gamers.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the World of Warcraft Druid Class, appealing to the Lead Game Designer of this game for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by the Authority of the good People of the Druids, solemnly publish and declare, That these Druids are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent Class; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Game Designers, and that all political connection between them and Blizzard Entertainment, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent Druids, they have full Power to levy Class changes, conclude Buffs, contract Balancing, establish Nerfs, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Classes may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Him debating Joey Galloway (part of the oil for food scandal ) about Iraq, the US  etc....

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6804714963382152969